What my client taught me during a golf lesson

“Michaelangelo went to a block of marble and took away all that wasn´t David”

This quote is the essence of Positive Impact Golf. Our job, as coaches, is to clear away all the barriers that are getting in the way of each golfer realising his or her full potential. We do this, fundamentally, by uncovering the hidden beliefs in each golfer´s head, often beliefs that are so deep in the unconscious they do not even know they are there.

My first lesson with Pedro, who is in his mid-70´s, was off the back of a one day workshop with Brian Sparks, my mentor. As we all know there is not a lot of teaching that goes on when Brian is coaching, but rather a guiding, and therefore I felt really up against it during this session. The pressure on me mounted as the session progressed as Pedro was not getting much success with his ball strike and he kept topping the ball and hitting it fat.

I could begin to feel his frustration, as well as my own, when, after 35 minutes I really had no idea what to say in order to help the poor guy. I hadn´t said anything up to this stage, well aware that any change I was going to initiate needed to be right on the button otherwise I would fill his head with swing thoughts and lose him as a client. And I could´nt see the one thing that I knew for sure would make the critical difference. “Was it the grip? Was it the posture?” I asked my self. I didn´t know so I continued to keep my mouth shut.

I kept reminding myself that Brian hadn´t said anything about his grip or posture or backswing and he was hitting it fine during the workshop. And then it dawned on me. Finally…. It felt like a pivotal moment that would make or break the session – for both of us. “Ask a question.” I remembered. “But what question should I ask?” I pondered. I didn´t know. So I decided to wait for the next bad shot. And then it just came out. “Pedro, what do YOU feel happened that caused you to top the ball on that shot?” Bammmmmm! He stopped. He scratched his chin. He was thinking. “I felt I lifted my head” he said. “Interesting”, I responded and then continued, “I have an idea. Why don´t you hit another shot and lift your head on purpose and see if you top the ball again?” He didn´t. In fact he hit a good shot. I waited for the next bad shot and again turned the question onto him of why he mishit the ball. This time he had a different excuse, “I felt that my knees were too straight at address”. We continued with the same exercise with me asking him to repeat what he thought he had done, keeping his knees straighter than usual at address. This was follwed by another good shot. And another one.

It was at this point when I said to him “You know Pedro, I am glad this has happened today with you hitting many bad shots for most of the lesson.” I continued, “and you will notice that I didn´t say anything and didn´t try to fix you in any way. And I think this is a very important point to remember and the big lesson to take away from today´s session.” I went on, “Do you remember in Brian´s book when he says if you are not 100 percent sure why you hit a bad shot then do not ask “WHY” and just get on with the next shot?” I explained to him that he had just proved to himself that each excuse he had for the bad shots were not actually true.

I finished by talking about the drastic state of golfers minds today, which are so full of swing thoughts and mental interference because they continue to analyse their bad shots, without any idea why and how they continue to invent every excuse under the Sun. I let him hit some more shots and encouraged him only to become aware of any tension in his body during his swing. He noticed how he was “snapping at it” on the downswing which he felt was affecting his rhythm. After a few minutes he began to really relax into it, becoming more and more aware of even the slightest sign of tension in his swing. And then, in no time at all, he found his mojo. He started to hit better shots with much more consistency.

The difference between the golfer in front of me now and the golfer I saw an hour ago was unrecognisable and I hadn´t changed a single thing. I know for a fact that if I had I would have ruined him (and lost him as a client). I would also have destroyed all the good work Brian had done with him only 3 weeks before. I can tell you I have never worked so hard for my money as I did during that one hour (which seemd like a lifetime) and it has taught me a very big lesson. I need to stay out of my own way and therefore to stay out of the student´s way.

I ended the conversation, and the lesson, emphasising the importance of not falling into this trap in future. The trap of analysing a bad shot. Any bad shot. And this is the disease of pretty much every amateur golfer throughout the world. As Brian states so clearly in his book, we will always hit bad shots. It is the nature of the gameof golf. And if you are not absolutely certain why, then forget about it and just get on with your next shot.

The belief that we, as golfers, have is that when we hit a bad shot we must have done something wrong. This is a deeply routed belief in the psyche of every golfer and one that consistently prevents each one of us from swinging our natural swing and reaching our true potential. Incidentally, it is only in golf that we do this. Imagine doing some DIY at home and whilst using a hammer, you miss or bend the nail, which often happens. Rather than simply carrying on as if nothing happened (which we do) imagine beginning the process of analysing all the possibilities that could have gone wrong, from not cocking your wrist correctly to the angle that your forearm approached the nail. It sounds like an insane thing to do, right? And yet this is exactly what golfers are doing incessantly every time they hit a bad shot.

I challenge you to take Brian´s advice the next time you take to the course. After you hit a bad shot, rather than ask the question “WHY” just forget about it and get on with the next shot. You may be surprised just how well you play.

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